What’s the difference between a Lamborghini and a dead hooker?
I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.
Joke Type: dark humor
Dark humor jokes, grim punchlines, and comedy from the questionable end of the emotional buffet from Chaotic Meh — sorted for people who know exactly what kind of bad idea they want.
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I Told My Wife I Wanted to Be Cremated
I told my wife I wanted to be cremated.
She made an appointment for Tuesday.
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Afternoon Tea With Cannibals
Two cannibal friends are sitting together over afternoon tea.
One looks across the table and asks, “Hey, I heard you and your boyfriend had a massive argument last night?”
“Oh, absolutely,” she replies. “It was dreadful.”
“So, where do things stand between you two now?”
She pauses, takes a delicate sip from her teacup, and says, “Well… right now, I’m just letting him stew.”
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Gender Is Like the Twin Towers
Jacob Manton
Dec 29, 2018 at 12:46 AM
Gender is like the twin towers
There used to be 2 and now it’s a sensitive subject -
The Last Body of the Day
A mortician is working on the last body of the day before he’s going to call it quits. He is amazed by the size of this man’s penis.
He says to himself, “Well, Mr. Shecky Goldstein, you clearly have the largest penis I have ever seen. I’m going to have to take a photo of this to show to my wife.”
He takes the photo, finishes up for the day, and goes home. When he sees his wife, he immediately takes out his phone and shows her the photo of the penis.
She looks aghast, then cries out, “Oh my God, Shecky Goldstein is dead!”
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British scientists have demonstrated that cigarettes can harm your children
British scientists have demonstrated that cigarettes can harm your children.
Fair enough. Use an ashtray.
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I’m really conflicted about abortion
I’m really conflicted about abortion.
I mean, I’m all for killing babies, but do we really want to give women the right to choose?
