Joke Type: pun

Pun jokes, punchlines, setups, and comedy bits from Chaotic Meh — sorted for people who know exactly what kind of bad idea they want.

  • Three Tons of Hair Stolen from Wig Factory

    Three tons of hair was stolen from a wig factory.

    Police are combing the area.

  • Books on Turtles

    [Walks into bookstore]

    Me: Do you have any books on turtles?

    Worker: Hard back?

    Me: Yeah, with little heads.

  • Three Horse

    An old Indian was asked the name of his wife,

    He replied, “Three Horse.”

    “That’s an unusual name for your wife, Three Horse. What does it mean?”

    The Indian replied, “It’s an old Indian name.”

    It means, Nag, Nag, Nag.

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  • One for the Road

    A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm.

    He says to the bartender, “Two beers please. One for me, and one for the road.”

  • No Words to Describe How Angry I Am

    I recently ordered a thesaurus online and when it arrived it was blank. I literally have no words to describe how angry I am.

  • The Wurst Is Yet to Come

    I ordered some German food from DoorDash. The sauerkraut has arrived but the wurst is yet to come.

  • Good Buoy

    I took my dog to the lake today and noticed he floats very well.

    He’s a very good buoy.

  • Cameron Diaz Colonoscopy

    Doctor: You need to get a colonoscopy
    Me: What’s that?
    Doctor: It’s a…

  • Cliff Was Born For This Job

    Cliff Was Born For This Job

    Cliff was born for this job.

    CLIFF HANGER
    Rock Climbing Instructor
    BBC BREAKFAST

  • Horse Walks Into A Bar Hey Sure

    Horse Walks Into A Bar Hey Sure

    Horse walks into a bar.

    Bartender: Hey.

    Horse: Sure.