Holocaust survivor dies during trip to Auschwitz
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Sensitivity: Dark
Dark humor, jokes, memes, and questionable punchlines from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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On a scale of 1-8 how old are you?
Doctor – On a scale of 1-8 how old are you?
Kid – It stops at 8?
Doctor – It does for you
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When you lose your son to heroin
When you lose your son to heroin ,but you’re kinda glad that you no longer have to eat cereal with a fork
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This 25-year-old mother set a new world record
THIS 25-YEAR-OLD MOTHER SET A NEW WORLD RECORD BY GIVING BIRTH TO 9 BABIES AT ONCE, AND AGAINST ALL ODDS, THEY ALL SURVIVED!
Jesus Christ, the crime rate is gonna skyrocket in their neighborhood!
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My grandpa used to brag that he can hold his breath for 5 minutes
My grandpa used to brag that he can hold his breath for 5 minutes,
It’s been 2 hours, He’s the real deal.
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When the school shooter decides to spare your life
when the school shooter decides to spare your life, but you have tourette syndrome and call him pussy 3 times
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Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like showering without Jerry Sandusky
Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like showering without Jerry Sandusky
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Fifty Bucks Is Fifty Bucks
Morris and his wife Esther went to the state fair every year, and every year Morris would say, “Esther, I’d like to ride in that helicopter.”
Esther always replied, “I know Morris, but that helicopter ride is 50 bucks — and 50 bucks is 50 bucks.”
One year Esther and Morris went to the fair, and Morris said, “Esther, I’m 85 years old. If I don’t ride that helicopter, I might never get another chance.”
Esther replied, “Morris, that helicopter is 50 bucks — and 50 bucks is 50 bucks.”
The pilot overheard the couple and said, “Folks, I’ll make you a deal. I’ll take the both of you for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and not say a word, I won’t charge you! But if you say one word, it’s 50 bucks.”
Morris and Esther agreed and up they went. The pilot did all kinds of fancy maneuvers, but not a word was heard. He did his daredevil tricks over and over again, but still not a word. When they landed, the pilot turned to Morris and said, “By golly, I did everything I could to get you to yell out, but you didn’t. I’m impressed!”
Morris replied, “Well, to tell you the truth, I almost said something when Esther fell out, but you know — 50 bucks is 50 bucks.”
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Fresh Dig Marks
Whenever I hear of a person missing from my neighborhood, I start digging holes in my yard. Nothing freaks out the cops more than fresh dig marks.
