Two little kids are in a hospital, lying on gurneys next to each other, outside the operating room.
Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
Unleash ChaosTone: Clever
Clever humor, jokes, memes, and punchlines sorted by emotional damage level from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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The Hearing Aids and the Will
An elderly gentleman had suffered from serious hearing problems for years.
He finally went to a doctor and was fitted with a set of excellent hearing aids.
A month later, he returned for a checkup.
The doctor smiled and said, “Your hearing is perfect! Your family must be thrilled that you can hear again.”
The old man replied, “Oh, I haven’t told my family yet. I just sit there quietly and listen to their conversations.”
He smiled and added, “I’ve changed my will three times already.”
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Albert and the Divorce Court
Albert wanted to divorce his wife, so they went to court.
Judge: “Are you sure you still want to divorce your wife?”
Albert: “Yes, Your Honor. I’m serious.”
Judge: “Don’t you regret it?”
Albert: “How could I not? Why should I keep a wife who goes out every night to cafés, bars, and clubs?”
Judge: “Does your wife drink alcohol?”
Albert: “Uh… no, sir.”
Judge: “Does she like dancing and partying?”
Albert: “Not really, sir.”
Judge: “Then what does she do every night in those places?”
Albert: “She’s looking for me, sir.”
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The Adult Toy Shop and the Checkered Thermos
The owner of an adult toy shop was training his new employee on the rules, how things worked, and the price list of their products.
“The only items without price tags are the dildos kept behind the cashier counter.
The white ones are $10, and the black ones are $25.
Everything else in the store already has the price marked on it.
Now, I’m heading out for a bit to take care of something important. I’ll be back in about an hour or two.”
Business went smoothly for an hour, until finally a customer asked about the items kept behind the counter.
“How much are those toys?”
“The white ones are $10, and the black ones are $25.”
“Oh, those are nice! How much is that one with the checkered pattern?”
Thinking quickly on his feet, the employee replied, “That one is $200.”
“SOLD! I’ll take it!”
An hour later, the owner returned and asked how business had been while he was gone.
“It was booming, Boss! I managed to sell five of the white ones and ten of the black ones. And I also got $200 for that checkered thermos of yours you had sitting back there!”
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Mrs Fire
I really miss Robin Williams. He was a legend!
Without a doubt my favorite movie of his was “Mrs Fire.”
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Spell Way
A husband got home early from work. He grabbed a beer from the fridge, sat in his favorite recliner and put the TV on a game!
His wife got home late from work! She immediately started dinner, the laundry and vacuuming!
As she walked by, her husband grabbed her hand and asked, “What are the chances of me getting laid tonight?”
She said, “Spell way!”
He replied, “W-A-Y!”
She said, “You forgot the F.”
He said, “There is no F in way!”
His wife replied, “Exactly!”
