Son: Dad, why is my sister named Teresa?
Dad: because your mom loves Easter and Teresa is an anagram of Easter.
Son: Thanks dad.
Dad: No problem Alan.
Tone: Clever
Clever humor, jokes, memes, and punchlines sorted by emotional damage level from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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Stationery Bike
To get into better shape, I treated myself to a new piece of exercise equipment. It looks real pretty with my name and address on it, but the paper cuts are killing me. I guess I should have done more research before getting a stationery bike.
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Selling Me a Bridge
My dentist must think I’m incredibly gullible; he keeps trying to sell me a bridge.
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Doctor’s Three-Day Sex Schedule Backfires
The newlyweds were suffering from exhaustion and after an examination, their doctor advised, “It’s not unusual for young people to overdo things during the first weeks of marriage. What you both need is rest. For the next month I want you to limit your sex life to those days of the week with an “R” in them. That is, Thursday, Friday and Saturday.”
Since the end of the week was approaching the newlyweds had no immediate difficulty following the medico’s orders. But on the first night of scheduled rest the young bride found herself eager as a beaver.
Hubby fell asleep, but she tossed and turned and finally nudged her spouse into partial wakefulness.
Expecting daylight, and confused with the darkness, he asked, “What day is it honey?”
She looks at him with a gleam in her eyes and says, “Mondray.”
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Nguyen-Nguyen Situation
My boss decided to hire two Vietnamese brothers instead of one.
It was a Nguyen-Nguyen situation.
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My Dog Is Really Smart
My dog is really smart.
I asked him, “What’s two minus two?”
He said nothing.
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Where I Draw the Line
I do a lot of illegal things…
But graffiti is where I draw the line.
