Tone: crude

Crude humor, jokes, memes, and punchlines sorted by emotional damage level from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

  • Fuck Like The Government

    Fuck Like The Government

    I may not be much to look at, but I fuck like The government.

  • Angry Raccoon

    Angry Raccoon

    angry raccoon

    When banging a girl from behind, you stick both your pointer fingers in her ass, and when she turns around in shock, you take your shitty fingers and circle around her eyes, making the appearance of a raccoon. Then you run out of the house, knocking over the trash can on the way out.

    After a visit to the zoo, I felt compelled to give my girl the angry raccoon.

  • Subway 6 Inches

    Subway 6 Inches

    Never date a chick that works at subway

    She knows what 6 inches really looks like

  • Not Good Enough For Her Family

    A redneck is on his honeymoon about to make love, when his wife says…

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    “Wait, honey, there’s somethin’ I need you to know. I’m a virgin.”

    “WHAT THE FOOK?” The man shouts, and he punches her in the face, knocks her out.

    He wraps her in the bedsheets, drags her down the stairs and out the door, throws her into the back of his pickup truck, and drives on over to her daddy’s house, where he dumps her in the yard.

    Then the man drives to his daddy’s house and goes inside.

    The dad sees his son, and says, “What the hell you doin’ here, boy? Ain’t you supposed to be with your new bride?”

    “Well, pa,” the son says, “I was, but she told me she’s still a virgin.”

    “Well holy dog-shit,” says the dad, “What’d you do then?”

    “I punched her in the face and knocked her out, wrapped her up in the sheets, drug her down the stairs and out the door, threw her in the back of my pick up, and then drove on to her daddy’s house and dumped her on the lawn.”

    The dad starts laughing, and, patting his son on the back, he says, “Good job, son. If she ain’t good enough for her family, I say she ain’t good enough for ours neither.”

  • Something I Dont Know

    Something I Dont Know

    hmm.. lovely weather today

    pft

    tell me something I don’t know

    your Grandma’s ass can take my whole fist..

  • How Do You Get a Gay to Fuck a Woman

    How do you get a gay to fuck a woman?

    Shit in her cunt.

  • Carrots Are Good for Your Memory

    Carrots are good for your memory.

    Get one shoved in your ass and you won’t forget it.

  • One Shot Tequila Mcdonalds

    One Shot Tequila Mcdonalds

    Fuck it, one shot of tequila won’t hurt

    3 hours later:

    Man Kicked Out Of McDonalds For Putting His D*ck In A Burger And Yelling THIS IS REAL MEAT, YOU F*CKERS!

  • Beat A Motherfucker With Another Motherfucker

    Beat A Motherfucker With Another Motherfucker

    I’LL BEAT A MOTHERFUCKER….

    WITH ANOTHER MOTHERFUCKER!!!

  • Huge Fart Stomach Ache

    Huge Fart Stomach Ache

    When you let out a huge-ass fart and your stomach ache disappears