I was banging this hot chick on her kitchen table when we heard the front door open.
She said, “It’s my husband! Quick, try the backdoor!”
Thinking back, I really should have run, but you don’t get offers like that every day.
Topic: sex
Dark sex jokes, adult memes, awkward hookups, bedroom disasters, and the kind of punchlines that should probably clear their browser history afterward.
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Fuck My Big Black Ass – PureBeam Extreme
PUREBEAM Extreme 20%
Real life size
meijer
Fuck My Big Black Ass
XXX Toys
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When Pigeons Have Sex They Die – Well the One I Fucked Did
Did you know that when pigeons have sex they die?
Really?
Well the one I fucked did
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Family Names Used to Be Based on Occupation – Hmm, Says Dickinson
Family names used to be based on the family occupation
Guy whose last name is Dickinson:
Hmm
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Your Word Is Seaward – C-U-N… Please No Jesus Stop
moderator: your word is ‘seaward’
spelling bee contestant: C-U-N…
moderator: please no jesus stop
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So Fred, You’re 97! What’s Your Secret?
Reporter: So Fred, you’re 97! What’s your secret?
Fred: I sucked a cock for a watch once.
Reporter: I meant secret of your longevity.
Fred: Oh! Fruits and vegetables.
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I Thought Pineapple Was Supposed to Make Your Cum Taste Better
I thought pineapple was supposed to make your cum taste better?? This tasted awful
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Who You Lasting Longer With – Mike Tyson or Mia Khalifa?
Who you lasting longer with?
1 minute with Mike Tyson
OR
1 minute with Mia Khalifa?
I don’t think I’d even be able to get an erection with Tyson….but I’ll try.
