Handy household tip: When realigning a screen door that’s slipped off the track, try using “shit piss motherfucking cocksucker.”
Delivery Style: deadpan
Deadpan joke delivery styles, punchline pacing, and comedy formats for people with specific chaos preferences from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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Thinking about losing weight, but I’m scared to discover what my
Thinking about losing weight, but I’m scared to discover what my penis looks like. What if it’s hideous?
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You can have my penis when you pry it from my cold, dead hands.
You can have my penis when you pry it from my cold, dead hands. Gun. I meant gun.
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I was just reprimanded for having washed out my coffee mug in
I was just reprimanded for having washed out my coffee mug in the bathroom sink instead of in the breakroom. I guess my superiors feel the lavatory should remain pristine for piss, shit and cum residue.
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I was walking my dog when a lady asked if the shit pile on her
I was walking my dog when a lady asked if the shit pile on her lawn was mine and I got super offended because I haven’t shat on a lawn in weeks.
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I took all the money I saved not buying Valentine’s Day presents
I took all the money I saved not buying Valentine’s Day presents over the years and bought masturbation toys. Now I own a solid gold fuck stick.
