Pun joke delivery styles, punchline pacing, and comedy formats for people with specific chaos preferences from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
The manufacturers of KY Jelly have announced that their product is now fully Year 2000 compliant.
In the light of this they have now renamed it as: Y2KY Jelly.
Said a spokesman: “The main benefit of this revision to our product, is that you can now insert four digits into your date instead of two.”
How many perverts does it take to put in a light bulb?
Just one, but it takes the entire emergency room to get it out!
What did the Indian say when the white man tied his penis in a knot?
“How come?”
What’s the definition of a teenager?
God’s punishment for enjoying sex.
Did you hear the slogan for the Stealth Condom?
They’ll never see you coming.
What do you call kinky sex with chocolate?
S&M&M.
What does Kodak film have in common with a condom?
They both capture that special moment.
Define Transvestite:
A guy who likes to eat, drink and be Mary!
Why is being in the military like a blowjob?
The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel.
What do you call twelve naked men sitting on each others shoulders?
A scrotum pole!
What’s the ultimate in rejection?
When you’re masturbating and your hand falls asleep.
Why don’t debutantes go to orgies?
There’d be too many thank you notes to write.
What is every Amish woman’s private fantasy?
Two Mennonite!
Why is sex like a game of bridge?
If you have a good hand, you don’t need a partner.
Can you say three two letter words that denote small?
Is it in?
What has a whole bunch of little balls and screws old ladies?
A bingo machine.
What’s the difference between a tire and 365 used rubbers?
One is a Goodyear and the other is a great year.
Q: What’s the difference between oral sex and anal sex?
A: Oral sex makes your day, anal sex makes your hole weak.
Want to hear a joke about Sodium?
Na.
Want to hear a joke about Sodium Hypobromite?
NaBrO.
I ONCE TIED ALL MY WATCHES TOGETHER TO MAKE A BELT
THEN REALIZED IT WAS A WAIST OF TIME
made on imgur
BEHOLD THE FIELD IN WHICH I GROW MY FUCKS LOOK THOU VPON IT AND THOU SHALT SEE THAT IT IS BARREN.
I’ve decided to quit my job as a personal trainer because the weights are too heavy.
I just handed in my too weak notice.
The Top 15 Wrigley Viagra Gum Slogans (regular version)
15. Double your measure, double your gun
14. Share a stick with the one you love
13. Just like the Cubs at Wrigley Field, you, too, will be able to play at night!
12. The flavor that never lets you down
11. We put the “spear” in “spearmint”
10. Double your pleasure, double your fun, halve your whining about how it’s never happened before
9. Chew it all the way home
8. New Wrigley’s Viagra gum: We bring your thing to life
7. Time for the seven-inch stretch!
6. Melts in your mouth, not in your pants
5. Have *you* had a stick lately?
4. Hey old man, wanna piece of candy?
3. Recommended by 4 out of 5 dentists as an effective way to fill cavities
2. Forget the flavor — *you’ll* be like a bedpost overnight
1. It’s Wrigidly Delicious!
[ The Top 5 List www.topfive.com ]
[ Copyright 2003 by Chris White ]
