One Liner Jokes, Memes & Dark Humor

There is perhaps no greater pleasure than to be the meat in the

There is perhaps no greater pleasure than to be the meat in the middle of a Jilly G. Filthy Rumination sandwich.

I wish I could be a hooker-magician. Then I’d throw a little

I wish I could be a hooker-magician. Then I’d throw a little humor into my act by yelling, “And now for my next trick…” and grabbing some guy by the wand.

I think God made a deal with cats and dogs. They got the ability

I think God made a deal with cats and dogs. They got the ability to lick their privates in exchange for having to lick their own butts clean.

What can I say, I’m good in bed. And I have the collection of

What can I say, I’m good in bed. And I have the collection of melted vibrators to prove it.

Dildos need a tagline, for marketing purposes. My suggestion:

Dildos need a tagline, for marketing purposes. My suggestion: “The gift that keeps on getting.”

In high school, I used to hold a notebook in front of my

In high school, I used to hold a notebook in front of my appendage to hide the wood I was sporting. Now that I’m older and more mature, I throw a parade in its honor.

I’m going to get a dog and name it MyRack. Then I can walk

I’m going to get a dog and name it MyRack. Then I can walk around the neighborhood yelling, “Has anyone seen MyRack?” and see which guys dare to answer.

My friends were all impressed with my devotion to CNN until they

My friends were all impressed with my devotion to CNN until they found out that for me it stands for “Cum-‘N’-Nap.”

Butterflies are free — around the world costs an extra fifty bucks

Butterflies are free — around the world costs an extra fifty bucks.

My wet T-shirt contests are popular, but my wet underpants

My wet T-shirt contests are popular, but my wet underpants contests are becoming legendary.

Format: one-liner