I bet the reason the folks settled on the name “Tinder” was that all the copyright attorneys got their panties twisted when they tried to use “Twatter.”
Format: one-liner
One-liners, quick jokes, short-form comedy, and punchlines built for impatient degenerates from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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I tell people to have a nice fucking day, unless they’re one of
I tell people to have a nice fucking day, unless they’re one of my pornstar friends. Then I like to tell them to have a nice day fucking.
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My application to join the Astronaut Wives Club was rejected.
My application to join the Astronaut Wives Club was rejected. It’s all fucking politics.
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Weird how people always say something bad smells like raw
Weird how people always say something bad smells like raw sewage, as if cooked sewage doesn’t smell like shit.
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Regarding being accused of masturbating in the shower: I can
Regarding being accused of masturbating in the shower: I can tell you that the fact my wife’s conditioner looks like semen has bailed me out on more than one occasion.
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During my sermon last Sunday, there was lots of screaming,
During my sermon last Sunday, there was lots of screaming, shitting and masturbating. Last time I preach to monkeys at the zoo.
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I gave my neighbor a bottle of wine when she moved in, and for a
I gave my neighbor a bottle of wine when she moved in, and for a goodbye gift I’m throwing an expired Lean Cuisine onto her lawn as I drive the fuck away.
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Dance in the School for the Blind’s talent show like nobody’s
Dance in the School for the Blind’s talent show like nobody’s watching.
