Format: one-liner

One-liners, quick jokes, short-form comedy, and punchlines built for impatient degenerates from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

  • Moo-spaper

    How do cows stay up to date?

    They read the moo-spaper.

  • Strongest Days

    Which days are the strongest?

    Saturday and Sunday. The rest are weekdays.

  • Weekend Immune System

    I only seem to get sick on weekdays.

    I must have a weekend immune system.

  • Disgruntled Employee

    For the Halloween party at work this year, I went as a disgruntled employee.

    The costume was simple: all I had to do was wear my regular clothes and improve my attitude.

  • They Were Wright

    About a hundred years ago a couple brothers said they could fly.

    They were Wright.

  • Violins

    Did you know that the string section of an orchestra is the most dangerous?

    It’s because of all the violins.

  • Eaton / Dayton

    I was datin’ this girl from Eaton.

    Or maybe it was the other way around and she was from Dayton.

  • Loggins Attempts

    I just got kicked out of a karaoke bar for singing “Danger Zone” five times.

    Apparently, I exceeded the maximum number of Loggins attempts.

  • The Hyperbole

    While the Super Bowl has about seventy thousand attendees each year, the hyperbole has at least a bajillion.

  • Elephant Wisdom

    Why are elephants so wise?

    It comes with getting long in the tooth.