I was told I could look at the eclipse through a colander.
I tried it, but it strained my eyes.
One-liners, quick jokes, short-form comedy, and punchlines built for impatient degenerates from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
I was told I could look at the eclipse through a colander.
I tried it, but it strained my eyes.
Did you guys hear about the worldwide sting operation on people who mix drinks?
Many of them are behind bars right now.
My wife is learning how to operate a bulldozer.
I’m not going to stand in her way.
Did you know that Helen Keller had a swing set?
You didn’t know? Neither did she.
They say make-up sex is the best, which is lucky, because all my sex is made up.
I just found out that cockfighting is done with chickens. That’s two years of training I’ll never get back.
If it’s 1 or 1,000 sins, you’re still getting sent to Hell. So why not go for 1,000,000 sins and come down here a legend.
A friendly reminder: anal sex requires no less than a butt load of lubricant.