Format: one-liner

One-liners, quick jokes, short-form comedy, and punchlines built for impatient degenerates from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

  • Geometry Fetishes

    People with geometry fetishes — they come in all shapes and sizes.

  • Pot holes should be more fun

    If you break it down linguistically, pot holes should really be a lot more fun.

  • My master’s in Reverse Psychology

    You guys really shouldn’t make a big deal out of me just because I got my master’s in Reverse Psychology.

  • Tends to be yellower

    The rain falls upon the just and unjust alike, though the rain that falls upon the just tends to be yellower.

  • The 69th Wedding Anniversary

    The 69th wedding anniversary should be the dildo anniversary. Not only is the number appropriate, but you’re definitely not fucking anyone by then.

  • It’s really easy to quit

    I don’t know why people say, “It’s so hard to quit.” It’s really easy when it’s something you didn’t want to do in the first place.

  • The dog won

    If you’re casually walking around carrying a sack of your dog’s shit, the dog won.

  • Why Don’t Blind People Like to Skydive?

    Why don’t blind people like to skydive?

    Because it scares the dog.

  • Parking fine

    A traffic cop went to the trouble of leaving a note under the wipers to let me know I’d positioned my car correctly…
    It said, “Parking fine.” So that was nice.

  • A Ford Oar two-door

    Ford should make a coupe and call it the Oar.
    It’d be a Ford Oar two-door.