I was going to tell a dead baby joke, but I decided to abort.
Format: one-liner
One-liners, quick jokes, short-form comedy, and punchlines built for impatient degenerates from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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Left Side Cut Off? He’s All Right!
Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off?
He’s all right now. -
Rare Medium Well: A Steak Pun Delight!
A steak pun is a rare medium well done.
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Backward Splash: The Diver’s Clever Dive!
Why do scuba divers fall backward into the water?
Because if they fell forward, they’d still be in the boat. -
Two-Tired: The Bicycle’s Balancing Act!
Why can’t a bicycle stand on its own?
It’s two-tired. -
Divorce: She Took It All, Even My Soles
My wife took everything from me in the divorce. Including my expensive shoes.
She has sole custody. -
Grief Lessons: Good Counsel, No Tears
My grief councillor died last week.
Luckily for me, though, he was very good at his job, because I really don’t give a shit.
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Between Marathons and Sprints: My Mixed Race Upbringing
My father ran the marathon but my mother ran the 100 meter dash so I grew up with mixed race parents.
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Blindfolded Style: Can’t See the Fashion!
I just bought a new blindfold, but I can’t see myself wearing it.
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Common Sense: The Deodorant of Wisdom
Common sense is like deodorant… the people who need it most never use it.
