Format: setup-punchline

Setup-punchline comedy formats, jokes, memes, and punchlines organized for easier doom-scrolling from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

  • A Visit To The Brothel

    A midget walks into a brothel with a honeycomb under his arm and a donkey following closely behind. He asks the headmistress for a woman for the evening, as his wife had left him.

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    She says, “Sure thing, but I gotta ask, what’s with the honeycomb and the donkey?”

    He says, “Well, my wife found a genie’s lamp, and her first wish was a home fit for a queen, and she ended up with a honeycomb. Then she asked for the nicest ass ever, and so she got this very well-behaved donkey.”

    The mistress asks about the third wish, and the midget says she wished I had a dick that hung past my knee.

    She says, “Well, that doesn’t sound so bad.”

    “It wouldn’t be that bad except I used to be 6’3”!”

    Share:TwitterFacebookLinkedinRedditWhatsappEmail

  • Snails Without Their Shells

    You’d think snails would be faster without their shells.

    But they’re actually a bit more sluggish.

  • Our Friend Claimed That He Scaled Mount Everest

    My wife thinks our friend is lying when he claimed that he scaled Mount Everest, but I disagree.

    I think he made it up.

  • My Kids Asked for a Dance Party in the Vegetable Garden

    My kids asked if they could have a dance party in the neighbor’s vegetable garden. I’m like, “Uh, why?”

    “Because they lettuce turnip the beets.”

  • A Joke About a Felon Walking Down Stairs

    I was going to tell you a joke about a dwarf felon walking down a set of stairs.

    But it’s a little condescending.

  • Do railroad workers need to be trained?

    Do railroad workers need to be trained?

  • Sundays Are Always a Little Bit Sad

    Sundays are always a little bit sad.

    But the day before is a sadder day.

  • An Elephant At The Bar

    An elephant walks into a bar. Nobody acknowledges him.

    The elephant went out and came back with a few of his fellow elephants and got a beer from the bartender.

    The other customers were amazed and asked how he did it.

    The elephant said, “You need to make yourself herd.”

    Share:TwitterFacebookLinkedinRedditWhatsappEmail

  • Taking Snails Out of Their Shells

    Taking snails out of their shells won’t make them go faster.

    On the contrary, it makes them more sluggish.

  • The British Engineers

    Scientists at NASA built a gun specifically to launch standard four-pound dead chickens at the windshields of airliners, military jets, and the space shuttle, all traveling at maximum velocity.

    The idea is to simulate the frequent incidents of collisions with airborne fowl to test the strength of the windshields.

    British engineers heard about the gun and were eager to test it on the windshields of their new high-speed trains. Arrangements were made, and a gun was sent to the British engineers.

    When the gun was fired, the engineers stood shocked as the chicken hurtled out of the barrel, crashed into the shatterproof shield, smashed it to smithereens, blasted through the control console, snapped the engineer’s backrest in two, and embedded itself in the back wall of the cabin, like an arrow shot from a bow. The horrified Brits sent NASA the disastrous results of the experiment, along with the designs of the windshield, and begged the U.S. scientists for suggestions.

    NASA responded with a one-line memo:

    “Defrost the chicken.”

    Share:TwitterFacebookLinkedinRedditWhatsappEmail