Joke Type: observational

Observational jokes, punchlines, setups, and comedy bits from Chaotic Meh — sorted for people who know exactly what kind of bad idea they want.

  • Disney Or Jerry Springer

    Disney Or Jerry Springer

    When someone asks about your family and you’re trying to decide if you should tell them the Disney or Jerry Springer version.

    Crystallowerycomedy on fb

  • Hold Her Steals

    Hold Her Steals

    When you have to hold her like this at night because she steals

    @whitepeoplehumor

  • Tooth Fairy Wood Coins

    Tooth Fairy Wood Coins

    Rodney Lacroix @RodLacroix

    Child: The Tooth Fairy left me three dollars!

    Me: When I was a kid the Tooth Fairy would leave us coins.

    Child: Were they made of wood?

    Me:

    Child:

    Me: The Tooth Fairy isn’t real.

    5:36 AM · 7/26/20 · Twitter for iPad

  • Bacon Roses

    Bacon Roses

    BACON ROSES

    She wants romance, you want a snack. Problem Solved.

  • I Feel Like a Baby

    Tim, Joe and Steve, life long friends, were down at the local tavern having a beer celebrating Steve’s 80th birthday.

    Steve grabbed his shoulder and said, “You know, I’m 80 and I can feel the aches and pains of my age.”

    Tim agreed, saying he can tell rain is coming by the aches in his knees.

    Joe shook his head. “Guys,” he said. “I feel like a baby.”

    Tim and Steve looked at each other, puzzled.

    Joey took a sip of beer and smiled. “I got no hair, no teeth and I pee my pants a lot!”

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  • Family Racist

    Family Racist

    SADLY LEARNED MY FAMILY WAS RACIST. I DATED A BLACK GIRL AND BROUGHT HER HOME TO MEET THE THEM.

    MY WIFE AND KIDS WOULDN’T EVEN TALK TO HER.

  • Email Server Down

    Email Server Down

    SENDS COMPANY WIDE EMAIL

    INFORMING COWORKERS THAT EMAIL SERVER IS CURRENTLY DOWN.

  • Push Up Last Year

    Push Up Last Year

    Why are my arms so weak?

    It’s like I did that push-up last year for nothing.

  • Canadian Graffiti

    Canadian Graffiti

    CANADIAN GRAFFITI

    YOUR MOM IS A NICE LADY

    AT ITS FINEST

  • Stevie Wonder Child Support

    Stevie Wonder Child Support

    You think your life is bad, Stevie Wonder paying 25K a month in child support, for some kids he ain’t NEVER SEEN..