WHEN YOU FINALLY
GET A GIRLFRIEND,
BUT YOU FORGOT THAT
YOU DON’T HAVE TO
BLOW HER UP.
Joke Type: sexual innuendo
Sexual innuendo jokes, punchlines, setups, and comedy bits from Chaotic Meh — sorted for people who know exactly what kind of bad idea they want.
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When You Finally Get a Girlfriend
-
Her Parents Ask About Intentions
Her parents: what are your intentions
with our daughter?
Me:
BARRY McCOCKINNER -
When She Adds Some Tongue Action
When she sucking yo Meat and
adds some tongue action.
are ya ready kids? -
You Coming to the BBQ?
Me: you coming to the bbq?
Her: what bbq?
Me: the one where I slap my meat across your grill -
A man goes to the doctor and complains that he has a bright orange penis
A man goes to the doctor and complains that he has a bright orange penis. The doctor takes a look, and sure enough, the man’s penis is bright orange.
The doctor asks the man about his daily habits to see if he could get a clue about the cause of the malady.
The man says, “My day is pretty normal. I get up in the morning and go to work. My work is at a desk in an office, so I don’t come into contact with any strange chemicals. I come home after work, make myself dinner, watch a little TV, then get ready for bed.”
The doctor asks, “Do you do anything before bed?”
The man says, “Nothing unusual, I just surf the web and eat Cheetos.”
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Is it OK to have oral sex with a 95-year-old woman?
Is it OK to have oral sex with a 95-year-old woman?
I wasn’t sure, and my friends said it was a bit of a grey area.
-
You Can Always Tell
You can always tell if a man masturbates a lot by looking at his hands…
If you look closely, you’ll see a wedding ring.
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Superman’s Superspeed Rooftop Encounter
Superman is flying over Metropolis on a hot summer day, coming home from a mission.
Suddenly in the distance he sees Wonder Woman sunbathing on a rooftop, completely nude. Superman thinks: “Man, she is so hot. I can fly down, fuck her with superspeed, and be back home with Lois in a few seconds without anyone noticing.”
So he speeds down there, does as planned and Wonder Woman only feels a rapid gush of wind and the building shaking.
“What on earth was that”, she stumbles.
The Invisible Man replies: “Fuck, I have no idea, but my ass suddenly hurts like hell!”
