I thought I was invisible, so I went to the doctor…
…unfortunately, he couldn’t see me.
Clean humor, jokes, memes, and questionable punchlines from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
I thought I was invisible, so I went to the doctor…
…unfortunately, he couldn’t see me.
Arthur is 75 years old. He’s played golf every day since his retirement 15 years ago. One day he arrives home looking downcast. “That’s it,” he tells his wife. “I’m giving up golf. My eyesight has become so bad that once I hit the ball, I couldn’t see where it went.”
His wife sympathizes and makes him a cup of tea. As they sit down, she says, “Why don’t you take my brother with you and give it one more try?”
“That’s no good,” sighs Arthur. “Your brother is 85. He can’t help.”
“He may be 85,” says the wife, “but his eyesight is perfect.”
So the next day, Arthur heads off to the golf course with his brother-in-law. He tees up, takes a mighty swing and squints down the fairway. He turns to the brother-in-law and says, “Did you see the ball?”
“Of course I did. Great shot!” answers the brother-in-law. “I have perfect eyesight.”
“Where did it go?” Arthur asks.
“I don’t remember.”
eBay is so useless.
I tried looking up lighters, and all they had was 13,749 matches.
Job Interviewer: Where do you see yourself in the next five years?
Me: I’d say my biggest weakness is listening.

Fantastic Four skins are coming to Fortnite
It is one of the most wanted collabs ever
philip lewis @Phil_Lewis_
Fantastic what
How can you tell Mike Tyson does not like religion?
Because he punches everyone on their faith.

Execute @execute
A whole island where men aren’t allowed. SuperShe Island in Finland is a women-only retreat. Founded in 2018, sold for over a million in 2023, and still enforcing a strict no-men policy. The only time a man steps foot there is to fix something, then he’s gone.
I entered a lottery to win an entire shopping center, but I failed.
I guess you can’t win a mall.
I’ll never forget what my granddad said to me before he croaked.
He said, “Hey kid, wanna hear my frog impression?”

Friend: Where are we going?
Me: No time to explain. Get in.
Poo Poo Point 79 h 4311 miles
Pee Pee Creek
Pee Pee Island