The reason I keep going back to Cherry is that she appreciates my eccentricities, like using exactly 2.5 tablespoons of lube, and that it has to be applied clockwise to both my cock and her sphincter, once before and once midway through. Yep, I’m *very* anal about anal.
Tone: deadpan
Deadpan humor, jokes, memes, and punchlines sorted by emotional damage level from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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None of the girls at the salon will wax my ass after they saw my
None of the girls at the salon will wax my ass after they saw my vestigial tail because now they think I’m a demon.
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are not an “up and comer” in life
are not an “up and comer” in life.
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Hiking is great. It’s is the only healthy activity you can take
Hiking is great. It’s is the only healthy activity you can take a shit in the middle of doing.
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A commercial just warned me not to buy their product if I have a
A commercial just warned me not to buy their product if I have a bowel blockage. I was surprised because I didn’t think plungers needed advertising.
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An adult silverback gorilla can weigh 180kg but they have
An adult silverback gorilla can weigh 180kg but they have teensy, tiny little dicks. If you meet one, don’t bring it up.
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Right after my “Name That Tune” loss I could have kicked myself
Right after my “Name That Tune” loss I could have kicked myself for not recognizing the subtle undertones which would have clued me in that the sound was “male TRANNY urination.”
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I was walking my dog when a lady asked if the shit pile on her
I was walking my dog when a lady asked if the shit pile on her lawn was mine and I got super offended because I haven’t shat on a lawn in weeks.
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Whenever someone with Alzheimer’s tries to apologize to me, I
Whenever someone with Alzheimer’s tries to apologize to me, I tell them to just forget about it.
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I don’t understand people who get all upset about people pissing
I don’t understand people who get all upset about people pissing in the shower. That said, shitting in the shower is COMPLETELY UNACCEPTABLE.
