Format: one-liner

One-liners, quick jokes, short-form comedy, and punchlines built for impatient degenerates from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

  • You Guys Have No Life

    What did Earth say to the other planets?

    Wow, you guys have no life.

  • It Was Actually Salsa

    I thought the audience was throwing tomato sauce at the tango dancer, but it was actually salsa.

  • Still Wouldn’t Tell Me Why It Crossed the Road

    I grilled a chicken for two hours…

    Still wouldn’t tell me why it crossed the road.

  • Home in Time for Dinner

    Decided to quit my job and travel the world until I run out of money!

    I should be home in time for dinner.

  • The Lesser of Two Evils

    My neighbor introduced his wife to me as his “better half.”

    I returned the courtesy and introduced my wife as the “lesser of two evils.”

  • Kenya Believe It

    My wife left me because I have an unhealthy obsession with Africa.

    Kenya believe it?!

  • Number Than Numb

    English puns make me feel numb but math puns make me feel number.

  • Words Cannot Describe How Much This Bugs Me

    I keep forgetting the difference between etymology and entomology…

    …and words cannot describe how much this bugs me.

  • Great Man Terrible Lifeguard

    My dad used to tell me that you can’t save anyone; they have to save themselves.

    Great man. Terrible lifeguard.