Format: one-liner

One-liners, quick jokes, short-form comedy, and punchlines built for impatient degenerates from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

  • Brunette Jokes

    What’s black and blue and brown and laying in a ditch?
    A brunette who’s told too many blonde jokes.

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    What do you call going on a blind date with a brunette?
    Brown-bagging it.

    What’s the real reason a brunette keeps her figure?
    No one else wants it.

    Why are so many blonde jokes one-liners?
    So brunettes can remember them.

    What do you call a brunette in a room full of blondes?
    Invisible.

    What’s a brunette’s mating call?
    “Has the blonde left yet?”

    Why didn’t Indians scalp brunettes?
    The hair from a buffalo’s butt was more manageable.

    Why is the brunette considered an evil color?
    When was the last time you saw a blonde witch?

    What do brunettes miss most about a great party?
    The invitation.

    What do you call a good looking man with a brunette?
    A hostage.

    Who makes bras for brunettes?
    Fisher-Price.

    Why are brunettes so proud of their hair?
    It matches their mustache.

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  • It Hurts When They Boil Their Nipples

    Why don’t blondes like to breastfeed their children?

    Because it hurts when they boil their nipples.

  • How Does a Blonde Hold Her Liquor

    How does a blonde hold her liquor?

    By the ears.

  • Count to 70

    Why can’t a blonde count to 70?

    Because 69 is a bit of a mouthful

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  • Knock Yourself Out

    I asked the surgeon if I could administer my own anesthesia.

    He said, “Sure, knock yourself out.”

  • I Seriously Doubt My Mom Would Go for It

    I don’t think I could ever be “born again,” like some of those Evangelicals I see. I don’t remember much from the first time, but umbilical cords freak me out, and I seriously doubt my mom would go for it.

  • Your Chance of Getting Hit by Lightning

    It’s silly to worry about storms.

    Your chance of getting hit by lightning is exactly the same as your chance of getting hit by lightning.

  • How Many Men Does It Take to Change a Light Bulb

    How many men does it take to change a light bulb?

    Four — one to actually change it and three friends to brag to about how he screwed it.