Setup-punchline comedy formats, jokes, memes, and punchlines organized for easier doom-scrolling from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
A guy visiting Arizona wants to get some.
He finds a pretty escort of Native American origin.
**Girl**: My fee is three hundred dollars.
**Guy**: Whaaaat? Your forefathers only wanted twenty-four bucks for the whole of Manhattan Island!
**Girl**: True enough… but Manhattan Island just lies there.
My dog is really smart.
I asked him, “What’s two minus two?”
He said nothing.
My girlfriend ran away screaming when she saw I had a huge penis.
Now the police are involved asking weird questions like “Who does it belong to?” and “Where is the rest of him?”
Two guys, Frank and Bob, were out fishing on a quiet lake.
A funeral procession passed over a nearby bridge, and Bob took off his hat.
He stood in silence with his hat over his heart until the cars passed.
“That was a very moving gesture, Bob,” Frank said.
Bob replied, “It’s the least I could do; I was married to her for 30 years.”
As my daughter was walking out the door to go on her first date, in my best grumpy old tough guy dad voice, I growled, “I want her home before midnight.” The boy she was going with stopped dead in his tracks, turned slowly around and with wide eyes replied….
“But you already own her home!”
A high end and very well known business wants to hire a new accountant.
But everybody who went in for an interview got rejected. People with 30+ years in the industry were turned away like they were morons. The reputation of this job started to spread, and caught the attention of a kid who recently graduated college and was looking for a job in the field.
He figured he had nothing to lose, so he applied and was called into an interview with the CEO.
The CEO said “I only ask one question when looking for accountants.” The kid gulped, but nodded. After a pause, the CEO asked:
“What’s 1+1?”
Confused, the kid thought about the question for a bit, then smiled and answered “it’s whatever you want it to be.”
“You got the job,” the CEO replied.
“Doctors and Nurses”
A woman brings ten-year-old Johnny home and tells his mother that he was caught playing doctors and nurses with Mary, her ten-year-old daughter.
Johnny’s mother says, “Let’s not be too harsh on them… they are bound to be curious about sex at that age.”
“Never mind sex” replies Mary’s mother. “He’s taken her fucking appendix out!”
