Traffic jams are much more tolerable if you just think of them really boring parades.
Format: setup-punchline
Setup-punchline comedy formats, jokes, memes, and punchlines organized for easier doom-scrolling from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
-
I want a body tattoo depicting all my bones and muscles, with labels, in case I get the
I want a body tattoo depicting all my bones and muscles, with labels, in case I get the doctor who was nowhere near head of his class.
-
What options other than “bang on the drum” do I have if I don’t want to work?
What options other than “bang on the drum” do I have if I don’t want to work?
-
Wait, I’m confused — do I bang a gong first, then get it on, or vice-versa?
Wait, I’m confused — do I bang a gong first, then get it on, or vice-versa?
-
Using the men’s room stall immediately after another guy left me torn between being the
Using the men’s room stall immediately after another guy left me torn between being the pleasure of having a warm seat versus being the disgust at using another dude’s ass-heat.
-
Then again, is there any use NOT beating a dead horse??
Then again, is there any use NOT beating a dead horse??
-
Before you criticize a baby, crawl a mile in its diaper.
Before you criticize a baby, crawl a mile in its diaper.
-
My wife seemed excited about the trove of sex toys I gave her for Christmas.
My wife seemed excited about the trove of sex toys I gave her for Christmas. She’ll be even more ecstatic when she learns I got them used for a pittance on eBay!
-
My wife fell asleep in my arms last night.
My wife fell asleep in my arms last night. She woke up this morning with an impression of the bazooka on her butt.
-
I hate winter.
I hate winter. By the time spring arrives, my nipples have worn holes through all my favorite shirts.
