bowel movement and the series of “Batman” movies they made back in the 1990s: They both went on a lot longer than I expected.
Tone: deadpan
Deadpan humor, jokes, memes, and punchlines sorted by emotional damage level from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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My boyfriend ran out on me. Luckily I’d used rechargeable batteries
My boyfriend ran out on me. Luckily I’d used rechargeable batteries.
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I think that woman at the animal shelter is overreacting. I
I think that woman at the animal shelter is overreacting. I never said I wanted to adopt a kitten; I said I wanted a little pussy.
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They say it is better to be pissed off than to be pissed on. I
They say it is better to be pissed off than to be pissed on. I don’t know about that — it probably depends on your particular fetish.
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sure he means that he likes my huge tits
sure he means that he likes my huge tits.
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My parents are very asexual. I swear the only times they had sex
My parents are very asexual. I swear the only times they had sex were when I was conceived, when my sister was conceived, and that time Dad shot me in my still-developing fetal eye.
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Thank God for Ruminations. I’ve tried for years to get Heloise
Thank God for Ruminations. I’ve tried for years to get Heloise to publish the following hint: “Tired of sleeping on the wet spot? Keep a hair dryer plugged in next to the bed. One minute on high is all it takes to dry that spot up so you can sleep easy.”
