Dark sex jokes, adult memes, awkward hookups, bedroom disasters, and the kind of punchlines that should probably clear their browser history afterward.
Three engineering students were discussing the possible designers of the human body. One said, “It had to be a mechanical engineer — look at all the joints.”
Another said, “No, it had to be an electrical engineer. The nervous system is just a marvel of millions of electrical connections.”
The third said, “Actually, it was a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline right through a recreational area?”
(Driving test)
Instructor: Turn the car on
Me: Umm ok. (rubbing interior) You like that? You filthy who-
Instructor: Ok we’re done here
“SAY IT WITH FLOWERS!”
“I NEED SOMETHING THAT SAYS, ‘I’D LIKE TO STICK MY DICK BETWEEN YOUR TITS’”
notquitesoancient: you know who’s gay? paul the real estate novelist who never had time for a wife and davey who’s still in the navy and probably will be for life
mooncustafer: New headcannon: everyone in that song is gay except the Piano Man who has no idea he’s playing at a gay bar and the staff and regulars have a betting pool on how long he’ll take to finally figure it out. So far John is ahead.
skeleton-richard: #that makes the ‘man what are you doing here’ line way funnier
Me too ice cream, me too
Made to be licked, topped, and loved
Jeni’s makes it better.
