Why are elephants so wise?
It comes with getting long in the tooth.
One-liner jokes, punchlines, setups, and comedy bits from Chaotic Meh — sorted for people who know exactly what kind of bad idea they want.
Why are elephants so wise?
It comes with getting long in the tooth.
I just bought an original Van Gogh coffee table.
I know it’s authentic because there’s a bit of veneer missing.
After spending an hour unclogging the bathtub and sink…
I’m feeling pretty drained.
A guy goes to the doctor and says, “Doc, I can’t get that song ‘She’s a Lady’ out of my head. It keeps repeating and repeating, and it just won’t go away.”
The doctor says, “Hmmm… sounds like a case of Tom Jones Syndrome.”
The guy says, “I’ve never heard of that. Is it rare?”
And the doctor says, “It’s not unusual.”
My friend David has just been a victim of ID theft.
He’s now called Dav.
Why did the employee at the calendar company get fired?
He took a day off.
I thought I was invisible, so I went to the doctor…
…unfortunately, he couldn’t see me.
eBay is so useless.
I tried looking up lighters, and all they had was 13,749 matches.
What is the speed limit of sex?
68 — because at 69 you have to turn around.