My girlfriend asked why I never buy her flowers.
I told her I didn’t know she sold flowers.
Joke Type: one-liner
One-liner jokes, punchlines, setups, and comedy bits from Chaotic Meh — sorted for people who know exactly what kind of bad idea they want.
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Now it’s a Ford Focus
I just dumped some Adderall in my Ford Fiesta’s gas tank…
Now it’s a Ford Focus. -
Watching a live stream
Why did the woman bring a remote control to the lake?
She was watching a live stream.
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He had squatter’s rights
Why didn’t the personal trainer get kicked out of his apartment?
He had squatter’s rights.
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A slipper
What do you call a shoe made from a banana?
A slipper.
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The thesaurus throat
I swallowed a bunch of synonyms today.
I’ve got the thesaurus throat I’ve ever had.
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Light blue
What’s blue and weighs very little?
Light blue.
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A meth head actor
What do you call an actor who’s addicted to meth?
A meth-head actor.
