A cop pulls over a car with two priests. The cop makes his way up to the window and says, “We’re looking for two child molesters.”
Joke Type: one-liner
One-liner jokes, punchlines, setups, and comedy bits from Chaotic Meh — sorted for people who know exactly what kind of bad idea they want.
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Left Side Cut Off? He’s All Right!
Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off?
He’s all right now. -
Rare Medium Well: A Steak Pun Delight!
A steak pun is a rare medium well done.
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Elevator Adventures: Uplifted and Let Down!
My first time using an elevator was an uplifting experience.
The second time let me down. -
Backward Splash: The Diver’s Clever Dive!
Why do scuba divers fall backward into the water?
Because if they fell forward, they’d still be in the boat. -
Two-Tired: The Bicycle’s Balancing Act!
Why can’t a bicycle stand on its own?
It’s two-tired. -
Grief Lessons: Good Counsel, No Tears
My grief councillor died last week.
Luckily for me, though, he was very good at his job, because I really don’t give a shit.
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Blindfolded Style: Can’t See the Fashion!
I just bought a new blindfold, but I can’t see myself wearing it.
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Common Sense: The Deodorant of Wisdom
Common sense is like deodorant… the people who need it most never use it.
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Stolen Antidepressants: Find Joy in My Pain
To whoever stole my antidepressants, I hope you’re happy.
